8 ways to deal with disobedient children

Child disobedience often causes parents terrible headache and stress because they do not know how to appropriately deal with this problem. Many families end up by spoiling their children or, in opposite, becoming more strict with children by forcing them to do things or punishing them when they are disobedient. These measures cannot really solve the problems from the root, which is very difficult to get completely changed. Instead, what parents should really do, in order to resolve and prevent child disobedience, is to begin with refining their own mind first.

1. Accept the nature of children at various ages, understand and teach them correctly.

2. Never try to overcome them directly but, instead, should apply techniques to motivate or persuade them to do thing voluntarily. Repeatedly telling or exhorting them to do things will make children feel more resisted. Adults should not expect children to immediately respond to the given instructions. Instead, give children more time and opportunity to consider the matter.

3. Avoid arguments that would possibly lead to fights or violence, and end up with punishment to children. Such actions lead to bad perception to each other and they are major causes of the disobedience.

4. Adults should be seriously firm with their point. Often, adults unintentionally spoil and make their children disobedient. For example, when adults ask children to do something but they refuse to do it. Then, adults take action to do things by themselves. Such incidence causes children to become ignorant to adults’ instructions.

5. Avoid often referring children in negative ways, as they will feel that the reference said by adults is true. For example, “he is so disobedient, never pay attention to anybody”. Instead, adults should support and promote children to see themselves in positive aspects by, for instance, saying “he is a good and generous boy”, “he likes to help doing the household works”.

6. Always create good relationship and mutual understanding. When children realize that there are persons that know and understand them, they will feel secured and loved accordingly, which make to respect and become more obedient to adults.

7. To make children become more cooperative in doing anything, we need to let them know that we are also cooperative with them. Do not interfere too often but, instead, appreciate and agree with their initiatives, when appropriate. Reasons should be given to children with friendly approach and they should always be based on principles that are feasible.

8. Above all, expressing parent’s love and giving time to children is very important because they will not feel lack of anything but, instead, they will feel fully loved with great care.